So I've been feeling like I am back at square one.

Let me clarify. I'm referring to my clarinet.

I bought some reeds about a year ago, but have not been seriously playing until a little over a month ago. I've been playing everyday.

I guess the reeds they sold me were for an Eb clarinet. Kind of odd, since those instruments are very rare, I think it's common name is an alto, or soprano clarinet. Mine is the common Bb clarinet, it's a larger instrument. This means that the reads are larger, making the space that you have to fit your breath through smaller. So like I said I've been playing with an Eb clarinet reed, it's smaller, very easy to get the air through, very easy to make a nice tone.

Like I said I feel like I'm back at square one. Now that I have the proper reeds, it is very difficult to make a sound, in fact this morning was the first time I coaxed a somewhat descent sound to come forth from my instrument. I mean, here I was practicing Mozart's "Andante" for the last 2 weeks, and then suddenly I couldn't get a damn sound out of the thing. Not to mention I almost passed out twice trying to force the air through the smaller opening now created by the proper sized reed.

FYI. Oboe players are the ones who usually pass out, since they are trying to fit all of there breath through something the size of one of those miniature straws they put in fast food coffee cups. fun, I'm sure.

So, anyway my Clarinet has become kind of a release for me. I've decided that I really like the instrument. When I was little I was desperate to play the violin. One of the few interests my parents did not immediately indulge me with. Hmmm I wonder why? Things to ponder, anyway.

When I got to sixth grade they started a new program at my elementary school. We had a zero hour band class. I was SUPPOSED to play the french horn. We did not have a music store in my small New Mexico town, so a store from another town came for the day to a local hotel and peddled there goods.

Narry a french horn among them. (I think my parents were relieved, cause a french horn starts at around 1,400 dollars.)

So, anyway being an impatient guy. (I can't hardly stand to catalog shop even. I want it NOW damn it!) I left the place with a clarinet.

Now usually I through myself into things, becoming somewhat of an expert. This failed to happen with the clarinet. In a band with 23 clarinet seats I was usually occupying the 22nd seat, playing third part clarinet... I know pitiful.

So anyway, I never really like the clarinet back then. And then the final blow, I was REALLY interested in playing Jazz Clarinet. The high school had a great jazz ensemble. I had visions of puffed cheek New Orleans Jazz clarinets in my head. When I went to talk to the Band teacher he flat out told me that the clarinet was not a Jazz instrument. What a dope.

I dropped out. Didn't touch my Clarinet for years, like 10 years actually.

Now I am rediscovering it. My eyes don't wonder to the french horns and violins in the music stores any longer... No, Now I look at the ebony Baldwin clarinets. The ones that make even a novice like me sound amazing. Instantly bumping up my playing skills several notches.

Oh man! The tone that emanates from those instruments! Haunting I tell you! So completely different from my composite resin clarinet. (let me translate. It is plastic =( I've been toying with financing one of these ebony goddesses. I don't know 1,200-3,000 bucks is a lot of money to plunk down on a hobby. BUT THE SOUND!!!!!!!! Ahhh... I could get lost in it. Hmmm... I wonder if pawn shops ever get clarinets??? There's a thought.

Maybe I should diversify...

Maybe I should go spend some money at a Mudville type place. If I can find a Mudville that is. Of course the drawing I have been working on for 3 years now, is still taped to my drafting table... I could work on that. Or start that triptych piece I have been planning in my mind for the last couple of months... Or LOL, I could do my work. You know get my report cards done.

Options, that is for sure.

There has got to be a pottery studio here in Houston. I just know there is... Hmmm.. anyway

Hmmm... I like teaching... I'm just not passionate about it. I think I could be If I had a secretary. LMAO

Sometimes I think I should regather, and start down a path towards something I am passionate about. Art, jewelry, cooking. I don't know.

Anyway, I'm going to go play, now that I can actually get a sound out of it again.

Love you guys!