I should have nearly an hour of sleep under my belt but I don't. I just really don't feel like sleeping at the moment, that and the fact that I laid down for a couple of hours of fitful sleep on the couch while Star Wars: Episode 1 played in the background as soon as I got home from work.

So, I've started writing in cursive. Probably the first time it has ever appeared in this journal ever. I can't say that I really like my cursive handwriting, but it does at least let me get my thoughts down with some speed, not as fast as typing, but certainly quicker then my print.

I love to watch the ink as I lay it down on the fine paper, but tonight I couldn't find a pen that wasn't dried up or cheap, so I'm using a pencil. Actually I'm finding that I rather like the sensation the graphite against the paper. It certainly does not have the glide that a nice pen does, but at the same time I find it's friction comforting. Like the touch of a close friend.

Incase you can't tell I'm not writing about anything, um . . . that's not accurate, I'm not writing about anything specific. I'm writing about everything and nothing, more to hear the scratch of the pencil and to watch the pages fill then anything.

I wonder, statistically speaking, about that last page that I completed. It is nothing more then a random series of words strung together to convey meaning. What I am wondering is, being that there are so many people on this earth, that if that page is truly unique, or has somebody else, somewhere, at another place in time has ever constructed the same page?

I wonder about weird things.

This is actually working quiet well. My mind has been so active lately it sometimes proves hard to fall asleep. I have to keep my mind busy do I don't start thinking about things that don't need to be thought about at this time of night. In someone's diary I read lately they said their Dr. told them to count to fall asleep. But, that counting was not enough cause it only uses one side of the brain which leaves the other half to start thinking about other things which keep you awake. Their Dr. told them to imagine a blackboard and that they are to draw the number on it in their head and that will use both sides of the brain.

Um... yeah.

That used to work for me too, but now I can do that and think about other things. Damn.

Wow! I'm actually getting really sleepy. You know my cursive is actually quiet pretty if I slow down to form the letters properly. Mrs. Spurlin would be so proud. She was my wonderfully cool second grade teacher who tried to teach me cursive. I was horrible at it. I couldn't even read my writing. In the 6th grade, Mrs. Smith sent me back to Mrs. Spurlin for 30 minutes a day to try to relearn my cursive. It didn't work. I just ended up committing myself to print, until this very year. How funny. 24 years old and I finally start to use cursive. I'm going to bed. Mia, the canine teddy bear, is muzzling up to me, ready to be cuddled.