I had the strangest dream last night. It was the first dream about Michael I've had in what seems like ages.

It was short, and to the point, although I'm completely unaware of what that point is. Except possibly that you never get over the death of one of your best friends. I can think of my Grandma, and my Grandpa without getting teary eyed and overly emotional. I miss them. I love them. But the deep overwhelming feeling that they have been ripped away from this earth is not there. The death of Michael still has the capability to make the tears flow and my heart ache.

In my dream, my classroom kids were lined up in two lines, as is the procedure in our school. We were in a strange school, not the school I teach at at all. I was walking backwards monitoring the lines, as is also the procedure. Suddenly, at the front of the line on my right, as if by magic, a child sized, yet adult Keri [Mike, Keri, and I were a trio of friends] appeared in a flash. My heart was over filled with joy at the site of her; my dear buddy and friend, and then the cold hard reminders of the loss of Mike took hold of my heart. She hugged me and held me in a solid, firm, bear hug not letting me go. A cathartic, screaming cry erupted from that place between my throat and chest where the soul of my voice resides. Keri held on with her vise like hug there in the strange school, surrounded by my current classroom of kidos. The dream was over, and I awoke.

Usually upon awaking, the emotions of my dreams are carried over into my waking state. This time instead of continuing my cathartic crying I awoke in a state of bewilderment and confusion. Trying to fathom an explanation for the appearance of Keri, and her reminders of the loss of Mike. I didn't cry then, I even went back to sleep. But as I type this now, relating back the facts to myself, the tears have flooded my cheeks, and pooled in the place where my glasses touch my cheeks, before continuing there cascade down my cheeks to my beard and then dripping to my naked lap. A part of me is glad that I still have these reminders of mike. Another part worries that I'm overly attached to a person so far from my now. Another part wonders if there is some deeper, esoteric mystical reason for these dreams. Some voice from the other side calling out in my dreams. I think most of all, that part of me that loves the bittersweet, appreciates these reminders of my friend.

Love to you.