It's been a crazy weekend. . . well not really but I couldn't think of another intro.

I've realized today that I'm most likely a bit depressed. It seems that since I've gotten home from Grandma's my usual distractions just haven't been that distracting as of late. I also realised that it's not necessary to feel the way I'm feeling and wonder if I need to seek professional help to make a decision about going back on meds.

Mrs. Fluff called on Friday. We chatted and she caught me up on the drama I missed during the week of work I missed. She also told me that our magnet funds have been frozen, "but don't worry! your still going to get paid." Honestly I half wish they would sever me. I'm so ready to be gone, capital g-o-n-e. seven weeks seems such a drawn out bit of torture to reamain in this city that has come to represent so many things I know longer value.

Went to dinner with Sean last night, Yuhayna's husband, and had a grand time chatting and telling crazy stories and cooking up plots about the wendies finger. We both favor the Guido theory, or Guida, as it were. Yep, mafia hit men disposing of bodies in wendie's chili. bleh.

I've created in my minds eye where I want to live in albuquerque. It'll be a industrial site or warehouse that has a bathroom, I'll spring for stove and washer dryer if need be. I want a blank slate. I want my bedroom to be a 10 foot plywood cube on industrial castors so I can move it around in the space whenever I feel like it. The space will be old and dirty and it won't matter if I splash paint on the floors. I can hang crushed velvet fabric panels to deliniate spaces and stain the concrete floors in earthy tones, run conduit for lighting and buy stainless steel work tables at restaraunt auctions for kitchen work space.

I finally got up off my ass today and started painting. I'm getting really good results with these new encaustic like techniques. I've been to the manill collection (thank God, ONE of the rothko's had been hung. BRING BACK THE ROTHKOS!) I want to have t'shirts made actually, where's rothko? kinda like where's waldo. I mean the manill has a great collection of rothkos if not the best, and it's a shame that they have not been on display. Today I went back to the MFAH and saw the kermit oliver exibit again. absolutely breathtaking. I can't find words to discribe my reactions to his works. classical style art has never moved me like his does. some of the pieces showed his under drawings. I never have patience to draw like that. I've missed two weeks of painting classes plus my mid-term formal critique. I've dedided just to salvage what I can, learn as much as I can from palmer, and to just enjoy the few weeks of class I have left.

Hugs.